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Remember the words of the popular song: “No matter what they do, things don’t work out. Apparently their mother gave birth on Monday”? It's easy to develop a loser complex. It is much more difficult to get rid of it.

Maneuvers of losers - how to cultivate a loser complex in yourself?

If you have not yet taken up a task and already know that you will not complete it, you are a failure!
If you ever get splashed by a passing car, you're a loser!
If the desired product runs out in front of you, you are a loser!
If you are late for work, for the bus, for a date, you are a failure!

And, if you yourself consider yourself a loser, then that’s the way it is. Means, you like it when people feel sorry for you, sympathize with you, and justify your mistakes.

Agree - comfortable position : no responsibility, no demand. You are a loser, a “loser”, what can we take from you?

Low self-esteem, as an unwillingness to deal with failures

Losers are not born, they are made.

When a person is too lazy to move towards the intended goal, he just immediately justifies himself : I won’t succeed. He will not, like an ant, carry a heavy burden. For what? After all, there’s always an excuse ready: I’m a “loser,” so there’s no point in even trying.

Losers and whiners. As a rule, these losers do not walk, but wander through life, cultivating a loser complex in themselves in every possible way, even with their dull appearance demonstrating submission to fate. As a rule, they do not have permanent friends. Well, who, tell me, is able to endure this constant whining for a long time?
Loser fighters. In addition to whining losers, there are also losers who are fighters. These people spend the lion's share of their efforts trying to convince both themselves and those around them that, despite all their efforts, nothing is working out for them. They listen patiently to their friends' advice, but they do everything their own way. They revel in their failures. Having realized this, friends simply stop paying attention to their whining.

I'm a loser - what to do, how to stop being a loser?

It's corny, but man is the architect of his own happiness. Aren’t successful co-workers, neighbors, and friends late for work? Didn't they get caught in the rain and forget their umbrella at home? Didn't they "take a dirty shower" from a passing car?
The only difference is in the assessment of the situation. The psychology of a loser is submission to fate; successful people look at even temporary failures with optimism.
Didn't work the first time? No problem! A lucky person will try again and again until he achieves the desired result.
So how do you stop being a loser? Maybe we should try to take failures more calmly? Prepare in advance for important meetings? Should they leave home a little earlier to have some extra time?

Change your attitude towards the world... ... and the world will change its attitude towards you. Just think about it: loser people are in a constant state of low-grade stress; they are sure that they are in trouble. vicious circle big and small problems. Where is it written that this circle cannot be broken?
Change! Feel free to change!

Do you think you're unlucky? Difficulties at work, lack of friends and personal life? If you answer yes to these questions, you should know what to do if you are a loser. This article will be useful for you if you decide to improve yourself.

Who is this loser? This definition means a person who is not

lucky in nothing. He loses in competitions, is abandoned by his lovers, is not noticed at work, and his friends gradually move away, giving preference to other people. If now you sighed sadly, brushed away a tear and saw yourself in it, then you are definitely a failure. Moreover, such people are a dangerous unit of society, capable of infecting others with their negativity. But you can (and even need to!) fight this. Loser syndrome is not a disease, it is an internal state and attitude to life.

Now let's determine why you became like this. Who do you blame for such a life? For example, you have low-income parents who could not provide you

normal education. Or there is a colleague at work who constantly snatches from you profitable projects. Yes, and there are strange representatives of the opposite sex who do not want to build normal relationships. So, if you blame others for your problems, then you are definitely a loser. If you see the reason in yourself, then you are a person with (and also a loser).

And now to the main thing. We will answer your question: “Why am I a loser.” You are one because you want it. It is very important for you to feel sorry for yourself and blame others for difficulties. Internal attitude has a direct relationship to behavior and to life in general. A loser counts on the help of others, and if he does not receive it, he is incredibly surprised, upset, and begins to blame everyone for his troubles. For example, your parents didn't give you a proper education because they didn't have money. Why didn’t you try to pass the exams yourself to enter the budget department? Why didn’t you sit stubbornly over books to gain knowledge and pass the test? IN

In the future, once you get a job, you could pay for your education yourself. If you had done just that, you would not be reading the article “What to do if you are a loser?”, but would be trying again and again to achieve your goal. Strong man, tuned to a good and prosperous future, is the one who will definitely achieve everything.

If you realize that your Life is going is not going according to plan, and are striving to change it, then congratulations on taking the first step. Next, you have to work hard on yourself, your thoughts, your attitude in life and on solving the problem - what to do if you are a loser. You need to understand that you are not a failure, that you need to love yourself and your life. Go to the mirror, look at yourself, say several times in a loud, decisive voice: “I can do anything. I'm happy. I will achieve everything. I'll fix everything." The main thing is to focus on “I”, because you are trying to change your life and become confident in your own abilities. Repeat this procedure several times a day.

Finally, I would like to give a brief answer to the question of what to do if you are a loser. They just need to stop being. No more, no less. And for this to happen, stop considering yourself a failure.

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Arthur Schopenhauer said that cowards produce cowards, scoundrels produce scoundrels, and losers produce only losers. But Immanuel Kant believed that character is not inherited, but is formed under the influence of internal experiences and external circumstances, and one can and should work on it.

But there is another theory: a person is not involved in what happens in his life, and all failures are the machinations of enemies and the influence of the stars. As a rule, this theory is held by confirmed losers.

website collected 10 principles that totally “unlucky” people follow. We believe that it is this approach that turns their life into a series of failures, and the stars and their enemies have nothing to do with it: as you know, the glass is simply half filled with water, and it depends only on us whether it is half empty or half full.

1. Blame others for your troubles

Didn't go to college? Because they only take people there through connections or bribes. Didn't get a bonus at work? The idiot boss rewards only relatives and sycophants. Did the girl dump you? This is because she is a fool (if a guy dumps him, “he’s a goat”). There is no bread at home and there is no bread in the store either - here it is, clear evidence of a universal conspiracy!

Finding and blaming someone to blame gives a person a false sense that the problem has been solved. However, she remains and will soon remind herself again. That's why successful people When a problem arises, they look not for those to blame, but for ways and tools to solve it.

2. Compare yourself to other people

Outsiders love to compare themselves to others. Regardless of who is chosen for comparison (more successful or less successful people), the result is not beneficial. In the first case, self-pity arises - one of the most destructive emotions that inhibit human development. In the second case, the loser has the opportunity to justify his own inaction.

At the same time, we need comparison in order to evaluate our own growth. Only You need to compare yourself not with other people, but with yourselfyourself - with who you were 10 years, 5 years or 1 year ago.

3. Don't believe in yourself

“You can’t jump over your head”, “you haven’t lived richly, it’s not worth starting”, “this is not for me” - these phrases are very popular among losers. Find extra income, start learning a new language, take a risk and give a compliment to a stranger- all this requires effort. It is much easier to find a weighty excuse and, without a twinge of conscience, refuse any attempts to change anything in your life.

It doesn’t hurt to recognize the very fact of the existence of certain difficulties, because in this way a person objectively assesses the situation and plans his actions. But it is necessary to understand that any obstacles, be it an economic crisis or Venus in the 7th house, will just make the path to success a little more difficult, and not completely block it.

4. Give up your goals and principles

People who constantly complain about bad luck easily follow the lead of others, change their beliefs and goals several times a day, or completely abandon them due to the slightest difficulties. Today a loser can be a convinced vegetarian, but tomorrow he will begin to condemn those who do not eat meat, because in this way they deprive themselves of vitamin B12.

The goal is a beacon that shows us the way even in pitch darkness, and our principles are fences that do not allow us to turn off the right road. No wonder Roy Disney said: “ It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are." When difficulties arise, successful people look for a way to cope with them, rather than rushing to change their guidelines.

5. Not being able to communicate with other people

Losers do not know how to build relationships with others, and with those who, in their opinion, are lower on the social ladder, they often behave arrogantly. It’s not without reason that they say that if you want to see the true face of a person, then you need to watch how he communicates with the service staff.

Those who have taken responsibility for their lives know that important be able to build relationships with people not only in the professional sphere, but also in personal life. They do not miss the opportunity to expand their circle of acquaintances and make efforts to maintain these relationships.

6. Procrastinate

Outsiders live as if they have another life left. The term “procrastination,” which is fashionable today, applies not only to routine tasks like cleaning or washing the dishes. Losers put off the realization of their desires until later, turning their own lives into a not very fun, and sometimes completely dull existence.

Successful people live for today. Steve Jobs often asked himself in the morning: “ What would I do today if it was my last day?" This great way stop putting off important things for later and start living right now.

7. Do not accept other points of view

Losers have a superficial understanding of almost everything. Ask any outsider how to restore order in the country, and you will receive comprehensive instructions, perhaps even in pictures. Confident that he is right, the loser is ready to argue, as they say, until he is blue in the face. At the same time, in his apartment, the chaos most likely begins from the very threshold.

Psychology has long known about the existence of an extremely interesting Dunning-Kruger effect, the essence of which is as follows: what less people understands something, the more confident he is that he is right and the more zealously he rejects other points of view. The effect also works in the opposite direction - The higher a person’s competence, the less he will argue and insist on his own opinion.

Losers are envious and, trying to explain their feelings of frustration, always try to find the “true” reason for the success of other people. Rich? I stole. Popular? You know how to weave intrigues. Are you healthy? I just haven't been to the doctor for a long time. Happily married? You successfully cover up the traces of your betrayals. Are you smiling? Fool, open your eyes! According to the loser, nothing good happens in life just like that.

As psychologists note, envy comes from the inability to experience pleasure in one’s own life. After all, often envious people do not actually want to possess what they envy, they are simply infuriated by the ability of others to get from life what they want.

It is difficult to argue with the fact that most failures in a person’s life are a consequence of his actions, committed under the influence of habits and character. But what or who is to blame that this person has such a character? Whose point of view is closer to you - Schopenhauer or Kant? Do you think that if a person is a sore loser, is it forever or can something be done about it?

10 + 10 “way” thoughts about success in life. Optimists DO NOT READ!

8 comments on ““10 + 10 “way” thoughts about success in life. Optimists DO NOT READ!”

Sergey, everything is fine as always. And 10 thoughts from Abramovich will solve all problems! You need to relax and think only about good things. 🙂

Vitalik, you only need to think about good things! And nothing else :)

Everything is right, right. Thank you!

IN-IN, relax, lie down, and get ready for a journey to the best of worlds. You can think about good things when full belly and a roof from the rain, but this is before hunger and cold, although you can continue to think about good things). Life is a constant struggle for food and shelter. If you are rude, hit, then you are being driven away from the feeding trough as if you were weak. Hunger will change your attitude towards life, but for now you can live as you live. The rest is all crap. If you want to eat deliciously and sleep on silk, go ahead, what does it have to do with resentment towards someone, comparisons with someone, no need to shake snot on your fist, go ahead to the goal or have already eaten and want to lie down, relax, and then get to the goal tomorrow).

As for trading Seryozha, I’ll say that trading is a 60/40 statistic + following the rules. I understand that not everyone wants to understand this and continues to enter into transactions anywhere, while losing money and losing the deposit, it’s easier this way and you don’t have to fight your illiteracy, you can lie down and relax until hunger tells you what to do.

Alex, you somehow ended up with a monologue of a hungry wolf who is ready to tear everyone and everything on the way to a well-fed life.

Your point of view is probably valid. You are probably not alone in your point of view. It’s probably easier for me to talk about optimism, goodwill, peace of mind and joy from the day, because everything is good in my life. I have a full belly, warm clothes and a roof from the rain. I don't have to fight for food and shelter.

But it was not always so! I have had in my life different situations and periods. There was satiety, there was also hunger. I had to, as you say, fight for survival (in the literal sense of the word) and respond to rudeness and rudeness with a direct blow of the fist (again, in the literal sense). BUT do you know what conclusion I made that has never let me down and never lets me down? You need to get out of any situation with dignity, without losing self-respect and without making dirty tricks! There are no unsolvable problems, only unpleasant solutions! But at the same time, you must always remain HUMAN and NEVER walk over “corpses” on the way to your goal!

And as for trading and homework, why did you decide that I am calling for illiteracy and relaxation? Quite the opposite! Only perseverance and daily hard work will bring the long-awaited positive result.

If we went through Abramovich point by point, we would get something like this:

- don’t rush to conclusions, the market (and the major player) itself will show and manifest its intentions.

— you shouldn’t ooh-ahh, roll your eyes and tell the whole world about your successes or failures in the market.

- don’t trade with the crowd, but trade with a big player who always works against the crowd ( )

- do not trade for the entire “cutlet” (the entire deposit)

— 2-3 stops in a row or 2-3 profits in a row do not mean that the trading system does not work or, on the contrary, is a “grail”.

— the resulting stop (provided that it was set correctly) is part of the work and payment for the risk, and not the tragedy of a lifetime.

— don’t trade on emotions, no matter which ones (depressive or euphoric).

- with optimism and apathy, I think everything is clear. If the market “gets you”, irritates and enrages you, then quit trading to hell and do something else...

- don’t look back at the past streak of successes or losses, the market doesn’t care what and how you did in the past. Trade here and now.

Losers don't value their time at all. Any successful person will tell you that time is our most valuable resource. People who achieve success value time even more than money. What's your job? We read Twitter, visited a site like Fishki.net or Bash.im, liked photos on Facebook and VKontakte.

But you make plans every year. Every year you promise yourself that “this year I will really work.” And everything is new. Your plans are not destined to come true. All because you don't pay attention required quantity time to complete tasks. Learn to manage your time, learn to say “no” - this will be a good step towards success in any area of your life.

2. You're not doing things that align with your goals.

It's not difficult to make decisions when you know what your values are.
Roy Disney

Outsiders confuse busyness with productivity. They mistakenly believe that it directly depends on employment. That's why losers take on everything. They take part in anything. As a result, they scatter their efforts into nowhere. The only thing they don't focus their efforts on is their goals and their values.

Write down your goals and strategy for achieving them. This will help you determine where you really need to focus your efforts. “The more important you consider it, the more likely you will accomplish a task.”

3. You don't take responsibility.

Yes, your boss really is an asshole and you really hate your job. But this is not a reason to do everything mediocre. You are paid to be at work and to do your job well. We must strive for excellence regardless of the circumstances. This is called maturity and wisdom. Losers are quite happy with bad grades. And they don't think about becoming better. One of the main rules of life is that it returns the effort you put in.

4. You limit yourself

“I’m just bad with numbers”, “I’m really bad at languages”, “My brain is not capable of learning programming”, “I’m not tough enough to run my own business” - these are all phrases of losers. They limit themselves. Forget that you have a limited set of skills and abilities. Stop thinking that everyone around you is smarter than you. This is the wrong way. Put in more effort, give it your all. Then you will be successful.

5. You are a master of excuses.

They always look for logical reasons for their failures. They look for reasons why they shouldn't have done something. And yet they find them. Losers go overboard with what is called “being realistic.” They constantly find excuses for their inactivity. They could have just tried it instead. As soon as your brain starts looking for an excuse, you need to stop it and activate the mechanism that triggers the desire to do something.

6. You don't know how to communicate and treat people.

You can easily judge a person's character by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.
Johann Goethe

Losers have no social skills. "By at least“I speak honestly”, “I am who I am, deal with it” - such phrases are uttered by losers. Unsuccessful people behave arrogantly without any reason to do so. Who likes show-offs? So don't be one! It's very easy to be nice and polite to someone you like. And you try to behave well with someone from whom you cannot get anything.

There is an excellent expression that The best way to check a person’s character is to look at his behavior in line and his attitude towards. Another good way get to know a person - look at his reaction when you ruin his thing.

7. You put everything off until later.

The funny thing is that losers call themselves the fashionable word “procrastinators.” And they are absolutely not ashamed of it. They don't understand the value of time at all. They are quite content to live in yesterday. Losers live as if they have another life left. But in reality, no one has the opportunity to pause life or rewind a little. Realize that you are dying from the moment you are born. Every day is a gift. You can do whatever you want, but keep in mind that tomorrow may not exist.

8. You don't act

Do it today. Tomorrow you will thank yourself for this.
Les Brown

This is too simple a rule for losers. Losers prefer to think rather than act. They speak beautifully, dream and plan beautifully. But unsuccessful people lack the impetus to take action. Stop dreaming - start doing!

9. You don't know how to deal with difficulties

There is one legend. It says that once upon a time there lived a shepherd who was small in stature and was not a warrior. He looked at the giant and said: “I will overcome you and cut off your head!” - and did it. The tests are only as difficult as you imagine and as your weakness allows. Losers don't understand this and quickly give up. They give up the moment the situation becomes uncomfortable.

There are no roses without thorns, children without labor and rainbows without thunderstorms. Trials not only bring us closer to our goals, but also make us into people we never dreamed of becoming. Don't be afraid of fears, fight them. This will open up new spaces for you. Yes, yes, we are talking about what is needed again. To find out your strength, you need to fight.

10. You are apathetic

You don't have an opinion and you can't make decisions. Unable to carry on intelligent conversations, unable to think openly if the topic is not from your area of expertise. Losers think that everyone should think the same way as them. Unsuccessful people don't read or study after school. At most, they graduate from college because “that’s the way it should be.” Even if they don't reach the limit of their potential, they don't care. They are capable of getting bored in a world of joy and miracles.

The quietest killer is apathy. Find yourself a hobby, do it. Even if you don't get paid for it. For now. Use your talent and find a use for it.

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